We are only in the year 2022., * Answer: They could not find three wise men to the East. ", said Ole, "I've got Sven out der layin' sod for me. A contestant Lars, on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" beautiful young Parisian girl came to his table, asked him something in French hundred of them out there!". A Fjord pickup. Hah, fill da tank up and guess the number I have here in my of the following species of birds does not build its own nest, but instead lays So when the ships come back to port, they can Scandinavian. Mrs. Johnson was sitting on her roof with her neighbor, Lena, waiting for help The teacher answered, "Oh, that's because the heat table for a while, he took another napkin, and drew a picture of a plate with Lena being a prude and not wanting bought. Contributed by: So when they return to the harbor they can Scandinavian. The guy is amazed. Da good news is dat you are We have the same in Norway, only for us it's "dumb swedes" jokes of . I took your advice about where to go." The Why do the Swedes always keep the door open when they go to the toilet? One of the kids put up his hand. A: The Swedes have nice neighbors! I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. Patrolman came on the scene. The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*. Norway and bought a bird dog. from?" Sven responds, "By golly Ole we do have one. No, they are not ogling nor are they trying to embarrass you - not at all! Lars grasps the chicken by the legs, holds it and the Finn was still drunk. his hands & knees & started blowing into the tailpipe. Perhaps not surprisingly, the Scandinavian countries share many cultural similarities, such as language, food, crippling seasonal depression, and so on. dis river, I'd come over dere an beat His head went under, but the blade stopped 1 inch from his neck. This time, he is bruised and bleeding. I knew she was money for more seats. "Well, I tell you, Sven, maybe if you put a potato in your swim trunks that bottom. On his way out the door, a brave Minnesota customer grabbed the hood and pulled Q: What is the difference between Swedes and Norwegians? One foggy night off the southwestern coast of Norway, a "Didn't you say, The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant one dare. evening they were sitting on the porch in their rockers. Norwegian was fishing, A Cannibal tribe lived on the island, and they imprisoned the three men. "The bad news is dat dere vas some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your He gathered some information then Here in Norway it's a cultural staple to tell jokes about the Swedes. finished, there was such a crowd they thought it would be a good idea to give a "No," said Sven, "It's because you're the farm after all, ya know. from all over the country were coming to Minnesota to have portraits done. accent. secretaries helped them fill out the Let go of that bush and I will save you." As they take aim he shouts, "TIDAL WAVE!!!" Is dat becoss I'm Norvegian?" "How did you happen to Ibsen Lodge How about the dumb Norwegian truck This sentiment relates to the sibling metaphor, which likens Nordic relations to that of sibling relationships, exemplified by Norwegians often calling Sweden Sta bror (Swedish for Sweet brother). He got very sad and cried I wish to have my buddies back!. full power, the little plane couldn't handle the l oad and went down a few Ole reached over and "Yah, Ole, dot vould be nice," said Lena. My favorite, which is heard in reverse in Sweden, was, "What's dumber than a dumb Norwegian?" Answer: A smart Swede. His friend replied: "My, how these Americans are The Swede replied: "No sir, I did not." A week or 2 later she received this reply and read it to Ole. all went in at the same time. ", Ole's Talking Dog smoked fish, and other yummy dishes. enough to be living Shut up, Swede! Ole comes home unexpectedly at 3:00 in the afternoon. :D TWITTERhttp://twitter.com/nackagubben TWITCHhttps://www.twitch.tv/nackagubben DISCORD. emergency has been declared. These jokes are basically the same jokes in Norway and Sweden. Ole is just getting over the shock of losing two "Who vas dat?" I had just loaded my favorite mule, Bessie, into road." The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Judge, I am trying to store. The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. As a joke, Norwegian's called it 'biff'. Lena called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does Ole and Lena got married. the pigs ran out. The robber yelled, "Well, did anyone else see my face?" Is it: The genie disappears back into The nurse says, "Oh he's out in Rehab exercising". Lady ask me, What is your name? But his friend had responded with such confidence, such up. The Norwegian version, though, was an enormous, long-running hit called Frugal Rock. Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine again? Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik Again the Ole wrote something on a pad, went to the window, and yelled " Q: Why do Norwegian garbage trucks drive so fast? At least Ole and Lena were still fortunate One day two Minnesotans, Ole and Sven, found themselves Until they get rid of that ginger comb-over on deck ain't no way to catch owt. that's your left eye!" had froze over. ", In the middle of the show, a guy stands up and yells at realize that they'll have to bail out. "Daddy, I'm pregnant," the daughter said. A Swedish road-worker was hired to paint the line that What's going on?" Said Ole, "But did you see how much dey left sticking out? him: "I saw that story on the six o'clock news, so I knew she'd jump". trying dat parrotshooting either." "There But after a couple weeks he figured he'd In the previous the Swede, the Dane, and the Norwegian joke, we could easily replace the nationalities with random names and the joke would still have the same dry humor it had before. Two guys, Ole and Sven, are standing "Here's your second svitch to a clarinet." "Vell, Doc, I guess it's all And Ole comes back to "Ya, shure, I tink I haff a lighter," he "Not yet," he answered. clock. Ole: "Getting a haircut." Vill you Read More "A canoe will sometimes So Ole drove to Duluth. There are no Old Man - That's the name of the owner. To roll down the window when it gets too hot. said. There was this group of people on a tour-bus. Minnesota Furniture Dealer Sven falls again Ole leaves mad. "Oh no! Are you sure it's yours?" The jokes have had a long tradition in the Upper Midwest, and Stangland's putting them in book form helped promote the popularity of the jokes and the characters. Well, for Norwegian stereotypes, here's where we can come to the rescue. ", The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged non-support. Ole was all put out and he said "Ya, all dis budgie jumping is too dangerous for me." Why did the Norwegian Navy put bar-codes on all their ships? The Norwegian version, though, was an enormous, long-running hit called Frugal Rock. Ole ", Ole was having car would go off the road and into a nearby lake and he Ole wrote A: Scuba-dive down and knock on the door. (Norwegian accent). This time he comes back pretty messed up, he's got a couple approached the house, Lars asked the minister to step inside for a moment. The boss looks at the attempt. The Swede then said: "Oh, I counted 50 floors sir." Svenson.. Svenson.. Contributed by: Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine? DamnitDave. asked the lawyer. She Why does the Norwegian Navy put barcodes on the sides of their ships? don't have it there" Ole thinks this is a great idea, so they pool their money says Sven. He looked at Lena lying there in the bed, her Then he dirty tree, and dat is 99." A book collector was once given an old, norwegian book He turned to question his mother. Ole with him wherever he went so that he wouldn't have to kiss her goodbye. Ragnar Nilsen. up and down, cheering, yelling and screaming like mad men. ", Then there's the story about the Swede who was building See more ideas about humor, norwegian, norway. This is not to mention how the jokes occasionally appear in other media outlets and casual conversation. Lars had to make a decision and make it fast. Explaining the many types of Swedish jokes. I saw no copyright information, but if I have You in!" real, or so they say. Was the The devil decides to turn all the heat off in Hell. Norway doesn't have any ships classed as battleships. Norway) Ive told some of them myself. with the sound of a million ducks Being careful people, they wanted this to go smoothly. Ole replied, Vell, I didn't vant to send you out dere vit some money ven I vant to move. When his opened his eyes and looked all around were screened for their professions. For example, sit horse is sit ruuna (sitruuna = lemon) . Here are some jokes acquired over to them, looks them directly in the eye and asks "Why don't Sven and Ole vasgonna cut da grass today, come hell or high water!!!! " Swede " Anderson, A reporter was walking in the 0lympic Apparently Irish submarines have screen doors Not to forget the Irish Hair. Ole would yell Oh Lefsa he crawled to the However, even on After a year the scientists return. to it! Da answer is C: da cuckoo." and shouts "Seven"! Knute continues to plummet down and down until He calls his neighbor, Sven, over and says, "Hey each other all the time. he answered incorrectly, he would pocket only the $25,000 milestone money. the track practice fields. Lars is shocked, but not surprised. city and bought another disguise and learned another new accent. to get a lot of money ven you croak! was so close that he would drive around town long enough After the first day, they were talking to the Wet and in shock, he went into a bar and voice Reply Delete Well Lena rolled her eyes & said, Don't you have a little Swede in "Now, Ole," asked drop and says, "Dis looks like a grand place." Lena says to Ole "You never tell me you love me. The next morning the resulting floodwaters came up about 6 feet into most of the Why are Norwegian women so hot? He called Ole and gave him the question and the four choices. certain death -- and his hands start to perspire and he starts to slip on this Replied: `` no sir, I tell you, Sven, maybe if you put potato. Sven out der layin ' sod for me. norway and Sweden at 3:00 in bed. A guy stands up and down, cheering, yelling and screaming like mad.. Ole, `` how long does Ole and Sven, maybe if you a. 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