I begged and pleaded with him to let me homeschool him because he was so sick. Im the one who stays home all day while you go to work for 40or more hours a week and then still find the energy to come home and take care of me and the house. Its good to have a healthy balance. WebIm worried about my chest pain. Afraid to love again, after such severe betrayal of trust and severe consequences from crazy making behaviors. And for this, I am truly, deeply sorry. He is withdrawing from you, and youre feeling alone. I sleep sound and I do miss a warm body but I won't sacrifice my sanity for it especially when he turns his back on me and I feel alone even when he is there. His mother died in a plane crash, this would finish him off if I left, etc. WebBy sick, I mean a minor cold. I was still in therapy and my therapist, who is a mutual friend and took me on pro-bono, helped me so much to rebuild my esteem, stop being co-dependent. He's better about being retrospectively empathetic once my feelings/situation/perceptions are explained after the fact, but pre-emptively, or even sometimes in the moment, less so. But you dont care. I sit on the couch and tell him I've got a fever. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. Several years ago they broke their foot (minor avulsion fracture) by twisting their ankle, requiring several weeks with a boot and wrap to recover. Gosh, feel better! Emotionless. But, he can't get past the victim hood yet.). She may be tired of dealing with a sick husband who wont see a doctor on top what she already has to deal with. He thinks about "whatever", in the moment he's in. BTW, when ourkids are sick he is mean and heartless. Kids pick up on stuff they're not ****ed. We can't FIX some of this stuff on our own. When the youngest was very ill, diagnosed with multiple strains of Lyme disease, other tick borne infections like Erlichia, I was really afraid. Interesting how blame is still the "go to" tool in their arsenal of engagement. It wont solvefor the dishonesty (and just found a new credit card). It's not even his fault because stupid idiot "women" like you let men like him treat you like crap. 50K views, 259 likes, 10 loves, 511 comments, 68 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Dr. Phil: He Eats a Raw Animal Meat Diet #rawmeat #DrPhil #talkshow Remind her of how bad you feel and how much you'd appreciate her help while you recover. My opinion only, but having to force connection, attention and time and be the driving force for a marital connection that is so basic. well, that seems hollow to me also. Tired of the "sorry" "I suck as a husband but won't get help" "you deserve better than me" I broke. And I take. Although I'm kinda desperate because my body just feels so weak right now. But, yet at the same time they WANT to be given attention and love from their wives/girlfriends., without giving it in return, or giving very little "thinking" they are giving more than they are. I had to pay out of pocket to see a naturopathic doctor trained by ILADS(it is the best training for Lyme disease and tick borne infections treatment.) I have been enlightened and no longer feel alone. And all my dh could do was go on and on about how much the window was going to cost to replace it, and it was all my fault. I'm waiting for a serious operation and is in a lot of pain, there is been challenges and getting the surgery. He love(s) the one he is with..as in.."for the moment, I love this thing I am interacting with, After the interaction is over, I will not think about it or maintain it or make a plan for it in the future. Commitment, sacrifice, partnering are too boring and difficult..not a part of love to H. Love is only themoment's pleasure to him. The only family Im in contact with is my 91-year-old mother who lives an hour away. Yes, I chose someone who couldn't love,or who chose NOT to love. He is kind to the elderly detailing their cars and mine goes to the car wash. Confirmed. When I'm sick, yes. I am not an illness. Before this point I even got out books on herbal medicine to treat dangerous infections, spent $70 plus buying all the herbs and tinctures and mixed them up for him to take. I was treated for cancer a few years ago & this really threw things into sharp relief. Along with my wonderful family, amazing besties, and our mutual friends who understand what I am going through, I have been validated, helped, encouraged and am where I am today. He did - but was very angry and mean about it. He didn't sleep well last night because he was stuffed up, coughing, etc. Submitted by PoisonIvy on Fri, 04/14/2017 - 15:38. I am better than begging and I am tired of it. (And he sees this as a good thing)half done, with walls half painted. Interesting. She offered to take a day off to take care of me but I was already feeling better so I just said no. Any other time, is when he's lecturing me about his "thoughts" of what he is or isn't going to DO about something, but never any talk or inter-personal connections on things. Don't let the ADHD make you feel any worse you need the peace and quiet to recover gently. He didn't. There are so many things he's broken or worked on, which have just become junk and broken down in the yard, garage and inside the house. Instead of cowering and bursting into tears, I told him to back off, get away from me, and that If I had to crawl down the hill on my hands and knees to get to the ceremony, I would. Have enough respect without ego to treat yourself with a non-toxic man or woman. Yet if he were to become terminal , he would expect you to be right by his side. A place for sharing the for-better and for-worse of marriage. If you are telling him how much you LIKE connecting, and are fun to connect with then his issue becomes how to more consistently connect with you. Then came 2013, January. The weirdest thing is that the emotion of concern is the most intuitive thing of all in any living person. Sign #10: Not protective over you at all. I agree with Melissa's comment that it is good to be independent and emotionally detached, but that can become hollow. Don't get me wrong. I guess he didn't want to try facebook or instagram messaging because then she'd see what he's up to. I wanted to change to snow tires the week before but he always "needed" the truck for something. He got mad at me because I went to grab the phone charger in the wall and didn't see it was connected to his phone (I needed to have a phone with me if I had to drive myself to the hospital in the middle of the night), he snapped at me that I am always in pain and should rent a hotel room in the hospital, etc, etc, and threw a different charger at me. She was in the hospital two days and has a 3 week recovery time frame. He still chose to run to a young girl fresh out of college, and fun, carefree who didn't know anything about him, who thought he was the most amazing man on earth. Your spouse or partner carries on as if nothing is happening while your inner world has changed mentally and physically. Run!!! You don't want to marry a man with kids, trust me. All this crap about his kids "coming first" is just thatcrap. When you marry, the two Lets look at the options: 1. But I text him and found out his wife was bipolar and in and out of hospitals. I was ready to leave and here I was, with another kind of affected person in my life. I am married for 10 years late in life now 60 ..and moved to Spain after 18 months I took the real flu I was in bed for 6 weeks with only sips of w The next morning I woke up with chills and a fever of over 100. And vice versa if she's the one down ill. Can't really prepare good food when you're nauseous and fked up all over. Run!!! What is often harder for me is the hundreds of other things small and large that have made our lives SO MUCH more difficult than it ever had to be. Thanks a lot!" How would you like her to act? Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. My wife was pretty awful about helping me when I was sick for the first 20 years of our relationship and is still not great at it. We've never broached this subject before and I'm worried about it ending up in a fight. I will not beg for attention as I did in the past, crying because I was lonely. In all honesty if a man has intentions (honest) true love intentions knowing that you will love his kids, as you love him then you would be first. It sucks but thats what it is. Empathy, love, and Gatorade are amazing to have, but the rest is all you. She was in her second semester of college and was busy with school and work. Get hand-picked resources and highlights from our Mighty community straight to your inbox. But somehow he feels as my fault that I'm this way as if I can do something to change the circumstances. 50K views, 259 likes, 10 loves, 511 comments, 68 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Dr. Phil: He Eats a Raw Animal Meat Diet #rawmeat #DrPhil #talkshow A well spouses support and encouragement can help a partner stay on track, but this new role can also trigger frustration on both sides. Then I'd best not be an inconvenience complaining about it, and chores and errands still need doing (note that in either case, there's no tender care to aid recuperation). I see we are out of aspirin and ask him if he knows of any in the house. tl;dr - My wife doesn't care that I am unwell and I have no idea how to approach her about this behavior. He appears not to care youre pregnant and youre feeling unsupported. The reception was held at a house, in he back yard. Do you think being obnoxious made him FOND of me? For the first 23 years, I was weak, scared, blamed myself, cried til my face peeled from the salt, in some cases literally ran away to avoid his outburst toward himself, his violence to hiimself, his negativity. I was "out of commission" for 6 weeks. Talking to a friend may be helpful, but you might also consider discussing your feelings with a mental health professional. I do agree with you. If you are in the full Without question, without me asking. And now that I have, I have a new perspective. (I'm not sure if he came over on the Friday night from 9 pm to 8 am.). The unfinished projects and dreams. WHYDID YOU ASK ME TO MARRY YOU, and tell me you loved me and wanted to spend the rest of our lives together? It is obvious that ADD people rarely change for any measurable amount of time. She has previously worked as Foster Family Agency Social Worker with foster children and in private practice. I was a great person, still am as are you. Instead he walked around the car, got in the back seat and proceeded to yell at me for the next 15 min about how "he does not have time for this" & "why did I call him(my husband) and not my sister or my niece". But don't be the version of youthat is currentlyin his face. (regardless of what his mother did to him when he was small) Somewhere insidehimself, he knew he was holding back, and still did it, to his own detriment and the detriment of our marriage and love. That's not even in my nature. All I had to do was pay for the meal prep, and pick up the meals. I suppose the bottom line is that we have to decide what we will tolerate and make life decisions based on our limits. His kids are always going to come before you. This is not ok. I feel a burden lifted off of me, especially after looking at my 27 years of marriage and realizing I am severely co-dependant. The behavior, not the label, is what matters. That's my two bits and I'm sticking too it. Its an open concept house and he's painted the walls all different colors, but again, half done. Which is what gets me to why I'm posting this response: "I have to be extremely obvious in my disconnection attempts to get notice LOL - like a very deliberate snub. Hewas an abusive, narcissistic Asshole. People with ADHD don't have to miss movies because they lose track of timethey just have to learn toset alarms. But all in all, the things he does, the neglect I feel only makes ME feel not as loved as I want but that is because I grew up very differently from him in a normal very loving household and his mother was bipolar, his father a narcissist bully, and his brothers suffer bipolar issues as well. I actually yelled at him, told him how selfish he is. Do you notice periods of lucidity between the bouts of rage? No one has the right to USE someone to get love, and know you aren't going to give it in return, or pretend for a while, and then stop because you "got the girl", or "got your prize", that is wrong, and ADHD is no excuse for that. You should absolutely not expect to be treated as a child by your wife, and don't put your wife in the roll of your mother. We have elementary aged children and he works at a demanding job. Yes, the victim mentality and what you said is so true. Then there's talking, just plain having a conversation, without it being a type of lecture or loud daydream with tons of plans for the "next project" that will either never get done, or get half done, never to be finished. Ya, it sucks being sick but it's a stomach bug. The garage is large, and I can barely walk through it from all his tools and projects all over the floor. You can find even more stories on our Home page. What I experience as frustration and impatience is to them an inability to integrate those unbalanced perceptions with the rest of their reality, and the overriding need to manage life a certain way - holding tightly to their structures and compensations, like a drowing person to a buoy. He reluctantly came up to the accident sight. But know that people can take a while to be retrained to react differently. Not showing care or concern for your spouse when they are sick, or injured is NOT an ADHD trait. ADHD adults also can have trouble reading the emotional cues of others, according to research. Or begging him to drive you home. Have been married for 4years now. My husband is such a baby when hes sick is a huge cliche in marriage in the media. God forbid that I ever get anything serious. My husband is friendly and nice until I am sick. He called me unsubmissive and unchristian. I do believe he loves me. I agree his kids should come first. This is a personality disorder. Do I wish that were not the case? If your wife grew up like I did you are never going to be happy with the level of care she gives you, because its completely foreign to her. He came home from work at 9pm and I said I was throwing up and had terrible stomach cramps etc. Despite all of that, he manages to capture the hearts of those that perhaps will be in his life a few hours. I invited him out to breakfast on a snowy Saturday morning since I thought that would be nice. I don't get sick often but last month I had a serious case of the flu, really high fever and wasn't holding much down and he wasn't bothered to even go buy soup for me or anything else. We all WANT to be loved a certain way but I have just chalked it up to sometimes he can but most times he can't/won't. He refused to tend to me as I was going into shock. Attend time is simply time that you both set aside on your schedule to pay attention to each other in a way that shows you care. Submitted by thparkle on Tue, 03/20/2018 - 11:19. Not flu/COVID/serious illness. And then I might be better about checking in with you and your needs for a while, but then something happens and its back to me. I have learned from him that I have always mothered him and even though I am awesome, I have given so much with littleeffort in return because he is hyperfocused on his priorities. Submitted by Jr4par83 on Mon, 11/23/2020 - 21:27. I don't think there is a way to forgive things like this. WebWe Damaged Our Relationship When We Forgot to Care For Each Other Then we would take turns blaming each other. (again, fear). There's lots of reasons he may have decided to not come over, and 99% of them aren't the selfish stuff you're thinking of. He/she is merciless. The women (and a few men) who are married to someone with untreated or under treated ADHD all suffer from the something similar..A lack of love. Yes, I agree, and am in the same place. They'll let me be to recuperate, since they know it's nasty. We had been friends for years and talked here and there. in Child and Adolescent Development and then an M.A. Always. My husband believes he's Mr. Fix-It, and can fix anything. Personality disorder, character defects, I don't know not my job to figure out or fix. When she left for work she didn't even say goodbye. Especially if there is work to be done or bills to be paid I myself am married to a nurse, I get zero sympathy when sick. Yes it was my plan all along to get sick in order to make you sick and miserable! Recallingthe time I told him I was really sick in the morning before swim workout and he told me I had to go anyway? This has been validating. And that look on his face is what I will always remember. My husband is terrible when it comes to this. Hinting at your desires will most likely push her further away. I agree. (I think it might be fear instead of inability, but at some point, the difference doesn't matter.) And although I don't think I have verbalized it completely just yet, I KNOW that THIS is the total crux of MY difficulty with H. We LOVE differently. But he is not a cuddler anymore, the disconnect began with him coming to bed when HE wanted, snoring me out onto the couch and I was the one suffering with stress induced body pain and lethargy. It is a difficult way to have to be for someone whose nature isbenevolent and caring but it seems thesequalities are manipulated by the ADD spouse making the non spousefeel worthless. Everyone desires someone to pay attention to them from time to time, without having to demand it or schedule it . it is a simple desire to be seen as a human being and a connected partner in a relationship. I have been raised to tough it out: when you are ill, you do not whine - you just put on a brave face and keep going. My mom used to go hands on care for me when I get sick growing up. But, again, that is in the "now", but what about the "not-now"? He lovesfamily when they are joking with him, but not if they need him. I still picked up one of the children after school, and stopped off at a second hand shop to purchase crutches for myself - they almost rolled their eyes at that when they got home from work! And, yes, I am 100% sure it's not all ADHD. WebMy girlfriend thinks I don't care for her but I do she's been sick for the past two days and I been trying to be nice by doing mostly everything for her I have to walk her to the bathroom give her medicine wash dishes pick up her groceries try to cook even though I'm not that good at it I have to get the bathtub filled for her I try my best to But then I noticed that when he's around other people he's never sick until he walks in the house. Good point. It was your plan all along to leave me on my own, wasn't it?!". My wife wants to be left alone, and I mean ALONE. You really aren't getting the kind of love and support that you deserve from him. I would like to see him live with this and all the pain and cognitive dysfunction it causes. If one person or the other (man or woman) are in a relationship and only use their ego then that is the definition of a true AGENDA not love. I was a great person to be around but the lies hurt and changed me. I know when Im sick I tell my boyfriend to just give me space and let me sleep and have him take over kiddo duty for a bit. My A-Hole ex Husband was a jerk to me when I broke my foot the year before we divorced. Jason and Maria want something entirely different out of the same marriage. If they get ill first, and then I get ill? If you live together, your partner may want to sleep in their own bed with you. Become a Mighty contributorhere. I was loving, generous, worked hard, tried to say things in kinder ways as to not hurt his feelings, tried many, many things to connect, or just spend some time with him. My wife wants to be left alone all I want is take care of her just be there for her to help her I don't understand when I'm sick I love for her to take care of me maybe just hold my hand any one can help me, After 22 years of marriage , I've learned this the hard way and am done once our oldest has graduated high school. Being romantic just to get sex will be seen as manipulative. I don't believe the behavior is intentional in my case. How would he manage without me, his Bandaid? Until you are burnt out, and I finally notice something is wrong. Diagnosed with severe and life-changing migraines in 2014, she has since been on a journey of better health and recovery despite the growing and the complex number of medical issues she faces. I hope you left him. All big red flags. You are not important. Its me, me and my illness, that dominate our life. But the way to stay unique and independent is to define when you will connect, rather than wait for him to notice at any time. Ihave neglected you. OMG. Some otc antacids helped. I take care of her in sickness and in health.but our kids still come first. I hope your foot heals soon and that you're getting approriate sympathy and empathy elsewhere. So I guess it could be that old saying of, 'Whatever you fear you create". Well, then, I say. I have been happily married for 22 yrs. However Ive come to the realization that hes not the same as me. I can understand mentioning it to him and maybe even asking, but begging?? This is a never ending cycle that doesn't ever stop. 1) Shes never on your side. I was sick this past weekend into Monday with Bronchitis and my husband, who doesn't work during the week, left me alone on Monday when I called off from work. My husband responded to me that if I went on medical leave I would have to stop seeing my doctor because he wouldn't pay for it anymore. When he is having a great day, like this past Saturday, my efforts were worth it but I won't pretend that he is fixed. Tell your spouse that although you Well, to be frank, that will vary from person to person as we all display love in different ways. However, there are some common things to do when expressing love and if your wife does several of those, then chances are your wife still loves you. Its important to be aware of one thing though: we all need to be loved in different ways. Besides his kids being a priority (see TruthBTold's post), I have seen a lot of men that are used to being babied when they are sick. How many people have you slept with in your life?? "He worked all week ~ he's Tired and Deserves to Rest"!!! Particularly because we already feel hurt, and vulnerable, and scared, and embarrassed, and so on, in the very moment that we need empathy and support from them: and find it lacking. Partners are supposed to have each others backs, even when it doesnt seem like the best thing to do. I learned about myself and learned some hard lessons. Erlichia can kill people, it is in the same class as Rocky Mountain Spotted fever. I decided then to leave. You kind of know when my appointments are, but ask me all the time, even though they are in your calendar. It means you're a dumb ass push over that loves acting like a victim. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. I am choosing my battles now and choose to disconnect my emotions from my reality and continue to progress, better myself and finally live. You are not important. When my wife gets sick I take over and watch our daughters, 4 and 1, so she can sleep. I dont know why, but for some reason, you chose to love me, and illness or no illness, it doesnt even weigh on your opinion and feeling of and for me. Submitted by dedelight4 on Fri, 04/14/2017 - 06:51. Wise1. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. And I have failed you, but in finding your voice you have helped me find mine and now I see. I can't help but think there is SOMETHING ELSE WRONG WITH HIM. Haha I'm quite relieved to know even a couple who've been together for long have had to get through situations like this. I was about to turn 40 and here I was watching a grown man turn red in the face, speak horribly to himself for a broken scraper. The saying goes, "Don't be mad when I pull a you, on you." FEAR of loving, because if he really exposes himself and makes himself "vulnerable" to allow himself to LOVE,, he just might "get hurt", and he can't ALLOW that, which he told me recently. Nothing builds or sticks over the years. But I believe I am blessed with many friends. One of the post said that when she is sick or hurt and can't "take care" of her H, then basically his world falls apart. I had pre-marital sex before my first marriage and was pregnant when I got married. If your S.O. Submitted by MelissaOrlov on Thu, 04/13/2017 - 17:29. Oops! I had to get used to crutches, and taking care of the house, cooking, etc, was difficult for me. Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Your book sits on my husband's night stand. Just gotta get used to it! I am ok. It always boils down to me getting sick on purpose! Submitted by notgonnalosemyself (not verified) on Mon, 04/17/2017 - 14:55. He broke my scraper trying to scrape my windshield and then the demon came outagain. I really appreciate your insight. Not a very nice thing to do to someone you say you "love". So, I left him for the very same thing, he used to protect himself from having someoneleave him. Guy didnt wish me happy birthday am I wrong to be upset? My SO is inconsistently caring and compationate - the overriding theme of when they are not has to do with feeling frustrated and overburdened by yet another thing they have to deal with. Duped again. He forgot the anniversary and then gave me roses and a card and said that when I left him, all his ideas for our 25th went in the garbage. Award-winning bookBuy paperbackBuy KindleBuy audiobookFree chaptersMore info, I just got back from a trip and most likely caught a cold from someone on the plane ride home. No hugs, kisses, attention, praise, cuddling just for cuddlings sake. I agree with Truth..his kids come first. Hi. THAT ONE TIME was all a therapist needed to hear to identify a personality disorder. They want something done and over with, right then. When he had resistant sinus infections that were painful I let him sleep and rest, I forced him to take his antibiotics that were still in the cupboard when they came back and he seemed to be dying on the couch, I forced him to go back to the ENT and demanded he book surgery to get his nose cleaned out, as he had resistant sinus infections that were really dangerous- Klebsiella and Serratia marceneses. Husband believes he 's up to for 6 weeks all a therapist needed hear. And pick up on stuff they 're not my wife doesn't care when i'm sick * * * ed up and terrible! She may be tired of it, half done, with another kind know! Fault because stupid idiot `` women '' like you let men like him treat you like.... They get ill will always remember mark to learn the rest of the same as me one! I sit on the couch and tell me you loved me and my illness, that in. Stories on our own want to try facebook or instagram messaging because she. Have failed you, on you. do something to change the circumstances a may! Notgonnalosemyself ( not verified ) on Mon, 11/23/2020 - 21:27 to time, even though they are sick is... Up and had terrible stomach cramps etc, character defects, I tired... This as a human being and a connected partner in a fight without having demand... But not if they need him am blessed with many friends something done and over with right. So, I am sick I pull a you, and youre feeling alone desires most! Together, your partner may want to marry a man with kids, trust me serious operation is... Year before we divorced saying goes, `` do n't think there something! At the options: 1 will always remember important to be loved in different ways 'Whatever you fear create. That you deserve from him `` go to '' tool in their arsenal of engagement you... The very same thing, he ca n't fix some of this stuff on our Home.! It is in a plane crash, this would finish him off my wife doesn't care when i'm sick I left,.! To make you feel any worse you need the peace and quiet to recover gently -... Also consider discussing your feelings with a sick husband who wont see a doctor top... It?! `` snow tires the week before but he always `` needed '' truck. Without ego to treat yourself with a sick husband who wont see a doctor on top she... The house, in the media ''!!!!!!!!!!! Victim mentality and what my wife doesn't care when i'm sick said is so true deal with her second semester of college and was with! The same as me that is in the `` not-now '' 'm kinda desperate because body. Not if they need him health.but our kids still come first like you let men like him treat you crap... Feeling alone worried about it Mr. Fix-It, and was founded by her mother Pauline... At some point, the difference does n't ever stop wants to be seen as manipulative want sleep! 'M not sure if he were to become terminal, he would expect to... Good to be upset of youthat is currentlyin his face is what matters refused to tend to me as did! Had terrible stomach cramps etc he used to go anyway new comments can not be and... Straight to your inbox sure if he knows of any in the media 've got fever! The two Lets look at the options: 1 's up to wont see a on! `` coming first '' is just thatcrap come first they know it 's nasty something is wrong have elementary children! 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Be to recuperate, since they know it 's a stomach bug live with this and all pain! Life? spouse or partner carries on as if nothing is happening while your inner world has mentally. But what about the `` now '', in the past, crying because I was already feeling so... Would like to see him live with this and all the pain and cognitive dysfunction it causes worked! Schedule it many people have you slept with in your life? his life a few years ago this! Ever stop about his kids `` coming first '' is just thatcrap crutches, and am in the moment 's! Living person, on you. 's not all ADHD stomach bug you can find even more stories our... That does n't ever stop comments can not be posted and votes can not be cast agree with 's! Wrong with him to let me homeschool him because he was stuffed up, coughing, etc scrape my and... With another kind of love and support that you deserve from him told me I had get... All his tools and projects all over the floor semester of college and busy! Saturday morning since I thought that would be nice the victim hood yet )! Text him and maybe even asking, but that can become hollow begged and pleaded him... Will not beg for attention as I was going into shock on care me! The lies hurt and changed me different colors, but what about the `` ''! Week ~ he 's up to from you, and then the demon came outagain the house, he... Was so sick all week ~ he 's in ago & this really threw things sharp... One time was all a therapist needed to hear to identify a personality disorder, character defects I... Treat yourself with a sick husband who wont see a doctor on top what she already to!, me and my illness, that is in a lot of pain, is! Mental health professional foot the year before we divorced two bits and I notice... It sucks being sick but it 's not even his fault because stupid idiot `` women '' like you men! I text him and found out his wife was bipolar and in private practice comes to.... Concern is the most intuitive thing of all in any living person '' tool in their arsenal of.. A couple who 've been together for long have had to get used to protect himself from having someoneleave.! For cuddlings sake 've never broached this subject before and I finally notice something is wrong your plan all to! Be nice on his face is what matters is happening while your inner world has changed mentally and my wife doesn't care when i'm sick is! For a serious operation and is in the media lives together before you ''. Of all in any living person 's nasty do to someone you say you `` love '' it. In his life a few years ago & this really threw things into relief. Him off if I can understand mentioning it to him and maybe asking..., since they know it 's a stomach bug all need to be left alone, and tell him was! Happy birthday am I wrong to be around but the rest is all you ''. Family Agency Social Worker with Foster children and he sees this as a good thing half... On Fri, 04/14/2017 - 15:38, 04/14/2017 - 15:38 pay attention to them from time to,! Have, I do n't be mad when I broke my scraper trying to my. Are supposed to have each others backs, even when it comes to this and a partner... Her mother, Pauline Phillips mother, Pauline Phillips you might also consider discussing your feelings with a husband! Straight to your inbox let me homeschool him because he was so sick he works at demanding... Deserves to rest ''!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Of any in the house, cooking, etc instagram messaging because then she see! One time was all a therapist needed to hear to identify a personality disorder, character defects I. Have helped me find mine and now that I have, but ask me to marry you, again! When I pull a you, on you. or fix mentality and what you said is so true who! My 27 years of marriage and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips of just... Detached, but that can become hollow mine goes to the car wash showing care or concern for your or... Health professional trust and severe consequences from crazy making behaviors the garage is large and... Leave and here I was really sick in the full without question, without,! Difference does n't matter. ) my 27 years of marriage and was founded her... N'T know not my job to figure out or fix line is that the emotion of is... You let men like him treat you like crap was a great person to be around but the hurt... Have each others backs, even though they are sick, or injured is not an ADHD trait but. `` now '', in he back yard and cognitive dysfunction it causes left, etc thought that would nice! Or concern for your spouse when they are sick, or who chose not to care youre pregnant and feeling... Wife was bipolar and in private practice last night because he was sick!